Merry Pat

"You never know what may cause them...but of this you can be sure. Whenever you find tears in your eyes,especially unexpected tears, it is well to pay the closest of attention. They are not only telling you something about the secret of who you are, but more often than not God is speaking to you through them of the mystery of where you have come from and is summoning you to where, if your soul is to be saved, you should go next." F. Buechner

Tomorrow is the anniversary of my daughter's (Merry Pat) death---39 years ago. She was 12 years old -killed in a traffic accident. I still have "unexpected tears." Recently Joe and I have been giving some workshops entitled "Grief and Hope." I give the clinical stuff on grief using Kubler-Ross material on the process of grief--Shock--Denial--Anger---Bargaining--Depression (I call it sadness)---Acceptance. I use examples from my grief process with Merry Pat's death. Joe gives the Hope stuff based in faith in the promises of God---God promises to be with us no matter what!

"the secret of who you are..."One of the things that "catches" me is my "unexpected tears." 39 years and the sadness remains. Long ago I realized this is my "new normal" but sometimes the memories are as painful as if it was yesterday.

And then a dear friend who we will spend tomorrow with (it is Father's Day) sent a note---"I know it is a difficult time for you but know you will be surrounded by people who love and care for you."

Another note from a friend  who held us in the immediate time following Merry Pat's death---"You will be remembered at Mass tomorrow."

"God is speaking to you through them of the mystery of where you have come from..."

What more can I want? To be surrounded by people who remember and who hold me now.

"...and is summoning you to where, if your soul is to be saved, you should go next." Listen.

Dear God, Help us be with those who are grieving, those who are struggling....a word to them of our love...of your Promise.

Blessings--Penny