sadness

I was talking with a friend this week about sadness. She recently attended a family reunion which apparently triggered a lot of memories associated with a particularly significant loss of many years ago. The loss was of a career, a profession, in which she had a very personal connection. It was truly who she saw herself as---not just a job---but essential to her core. The loss was related to her addiction and she acknowledges it was truly her own fault.

I was empathizing that the anniversary of my daughter's death is coming around again and the anniversary triggers the depth of her loss again. My friend's comment was meaningful. "You know you put the loss aside on a daily basis. You go on and realize that you have to get on with your life. But when a trigger such as my reunion or your daughter's death anniversary comes around, the pain returns. It's not like it was years ago---it's like it was ten minutes ago or 10 days ago."

How do we go on when the sadness is so core? When it again invades our nighttime and daytime dreams and thoughts?

The only way I know is to pray. To ask God to help me feel His loving arms holding me. I don't always feel that every day. There are certainly times I even wonder about the whole existence of God.
And yet, in times of deep sadness, there is a real comfort in prayer and even the hope that God is holding the sadness with me. "Faith...the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not seen."
Blessings-Penny