Happy Easter!

We leave tomorrow for Easter with our sons and their families. Back in about a week so no new blogs until then.
A Blessed Easter to all. May you hear the trumpets of joy on Easter Sunday---joy that your sins are forgiven, that there is a new life for all.

What will you do with that new life?
Blessings-Penny

old messages

Early the last 2 mornings I have done radio phone interviews related to my new book. They lasted 10-15 minutes. Yesterday morning I completed the call and then sulked around our apartment for a couple of hours telling myself I had not done a very good job---hadn't said this----hadn't said that---hadn't done it "perfectly." I could hear the old "be perfect" message in my head. I recognized it as an old message  but just couldn't shut it off completely.

A couple of hours later I checked my email and there was an email from my publisher, She  said  the radio show had loved me and want me back to do a 25 minute interview in April. I was stunned and so very pleased.

What a lesson. Those old messages come back with a vengence when we have moments of self doubt. During my sulking period yesterday, I had prayed that God would help me work through this, that I could accept my not "being perfect," that if I wasn't perfect, it really didn't matter in the larger picture.....that there are friends and family struggling with huge issues...that I needed to get a grip! Though it all worked out wonderfully-thanks to God's grace---I am in awe of the power of the old messages.

Are there old messages that get triggered in your life? What do you do with them? Do they take control of your mood?

Can you ask God today to help you minimize the power of those old destructive messages? Can you accept the peace that comes when you bring that prayer into your life?

Blessings-Penny

new word

I spoke with a friend today who said she had a new "f" word. I kind of cringed and asked, "What is it?" She said, "I used to say the "f"word all the time, but now I've changed that word to "forgive." I never knew what a different sense of peace that small change could bring. Who knew?"

How many times a day do we hear the "f" word-on television, behind us in the check out line, in casual conversations?

Do you use the "f" word ? Can you work towards changing it to "forgive?"
Would that make a difference in your sense of peace?

Blessings-Penny

From sad to glad

Another family story. The brother of the woman I talked about in the last blog also has this disease of addiction. They are both adults and have struggled for years. Jimmy (not his real name) got out of treatment about 2 weeks ago. We went to see him Saturday. He is doing well-lots of meetings-lots of prayer. But a few days ago he found a beer which he had forgotten was in his truck. He said he looked at it for a long time wondering if he should drink it or throw it away. After all, "Who would know?" But them he told himself, "What am I struggling about? If I wanted to buy myself a keg, I could. But if I drink, I throw away all the good things God has given me." And he threw the beer away. He also is struggling with some marital issues.

He was pleased he had managed through some tough moments. He sensed the added strength that comes with each success. He laughed.

An awful lot of things can sabotage recovery. Generally those things are called "life."

He asked us to pray with him.

What are you doing today to strengthen your recovery? Can you whisper little prayers of thanks?
Blessings-Penny

Sabotage

A family member was supposed to go to treatment today. This person has been to treatment a couple of times but has been using meth for several years and considers marijuana a "gift from God." When she got to the admission office she "lost it" and was not admitted. I'm not certain what "lost it" meant but the admission person evaluated her as not appropriate for that facility.

It seems to me that my relative "sabotaged" her treatment. She had been less than enthusiastic about her readmission and proclaimed she wanted to give up the meth but not the marijuana. Sabotaging treatment and recovery is not unusual for people not committed to recovery. We find excuses to do or not do the things we know  will keep us in recovery. We don't have time for meetings. We don't have time for prayer. We tell ourselves we won't drink even if we stop at the bar to see friends.  We let ourselves get too Hungry-Angry-Lonely-Tired--HALT. We stop calling our sponsor.We sabotage our plan for recovery in a hundred different ways.

This is such a sad disease.I am sad for my relative. I am sad for her teenage son. I am sad for her mother.

What will you do today to enrich your program of recovery? How will you strengthen it?
Will you ask God to remind you He is right there with you? You are not in this alone. It does not have to be sad.
Blessings-Penny

trust

We often hear the question, "How can I ever trust him/her again?" That question might be asked when one of our kids gets into trouble. It might be asked when someone betrays a confidence we have shared. It might be asked when relapse occurs in a recovering person. The person in relapse might even ask himself or herself, "How can I trust myself again?...I screw this up over and over.""
We concerned friends or counselors might give the advice that rebuilding trust is a very slow process done in small steps---whether that is with our kids, our friends , our spouse, or ourself.  We might make suggestions such as, "What is one small thing you can do or say today that would be evidence that you want to win that person's trust back?" We might utter such platitudes as "Actions speak louder than words."
And in our human relationships that is true. Actions do speak louder than words.
The great news is that in our relationship with God we don't have to ask how to earn back His trust. He never gives up His trust in us. He believes in us. He trusts we will use the gifts he has given us to do His work-whether that be as a parent, a friend, a spouse, a self. When we fail, He does not condemn us but remembers we are "dust"-frail, bumbling people that He claims as His own.

Do you believe you are God's own? Does that make a difference in your day today? How?
Blessings-Penny

Heroes and saints

There are 4 people close to me who I consider real heroes and saints.  All are caretakers. One woman cares for her husband with Parkinsons. They've been married over 50 years. She is exhausted-little money, little help, adult children live far away. Another is a grandmother who cares for her teenage grandson. The boy's mother is an addict and comes in and out of the picture. My friend gives the consistency and safety this child needs. She prays she lives until he is at least 18. The third friend is in her late 50's. Her husband, who is a few years younger, has early Alzheimer's disease. He has lost his job. She is breadwinner, mother and caregiver. And the fourth friend(s) are a couple who care for their grand daughter with autism. The child's parents work and my friends have moved close by completely changing their years of retirement. I heard my friend is terribly thin from chasing after this very active child.

I have mentioned these friends in other blogs and I mention them again because their courage and commitment continues to profoundly move me.

How do they dig deeply within their love, their spirituality to find the energy to get up in the morning-to keep doing what they do?
Is there a struggle or challenge you have that names you as a hero or a saint because you get up each morning and face it?
Are you a hero?
Do you call upon God to remind you that He is with you---even in the most difficult times?
(I smiled when the Pope said this week that sometimes he felt that God was asleep.If even the Pope can feel that way, then it's ok if I sometimes wonder where He is in my life!)
Blessings, Penny