struggles

Why is recovery so difficult for some people?? Access to the drug of choice is certainly one issue.
Two people I recently met are sure struggling with access issues. One is a man in his middle life. He is a cocaine addict ---lives in a rough part of town--his dealer comes to his apartment door and asks if he wants a bag. He lives where he does because the rent is cheap and he can walk to work. He does sidewalk portraits in the tourist area---no real boss to report to. But when told of a cocaine anonymous meeting a couple of blocks from home, he chooses to say he has to work. The meeting is early evening---his works until midnight. Choices...priorities..."if nothing changes, nothing changes."

The other person struggling with access is a young woman. She is currently living at home because of serious mental health issues. The family really didn't think drugs were a problem so when the dad had recent surgery and was given a prescription for oxycodon, the 60 pills were left in the parents' bathroom. When dad went to take his prescribed dosage, 4 pills were still in the bottle. The young woman was taken to the emergency room and admitted to a psyc unit for a few days. The therapist said this woman "just doesn't want to feel anything." Just a reminder that young people often access drugs from their parents medicine cabinet. They even have parties called "pharm parties" where they pool their drugs.

I remember my early recovery and access to liquor. We had a pretty large assortment of spirits and  wine which I accessed earlier and earlier in the day. I finally told my husband we had to put them in a foot locker with a padlock---and don't tell me where the key is. There was simply no way I was able to not drink with access so readily available. The compulsion, the disease was too powerful.

Access is part of the struggle with recovery. Making choices that minimize that access are vital. Making a commitment to recovery is one of those choices...for addicts and their families.

Are you committed to recovery? Do you renew that commitment each day? Do your choices reflect that commitment? Each morning do you ask God to give you the strength and courage to make the recovery choices?

Blessings-Penny